Tears
Your tears tell a story that is your deepest truth.
As tears caress your skin, it remembers the moments of touching, the moments of holding, the moments of caring, struggling, growing and loving. Your tears remember words that were said and grieve the unexpected.
Are you listening to your tears?
You are the most important listener because your tears put you in touch with your deepest self. Tears tell you how deeply your loss is buried within you.
If you can remember that all the blessings of your life are present in your tears, you will not reject them or become shamed by them.
Tears will become the part of you that turns experience into memory, death into life, history into a legend.
You have always known that you must walk the road of grief, but yesterday you did not know that it would be today.
Find hope in the wetness of your tears. It is a gift you give yourself. Trust their truth.
Kiss Your Life... 365 Reasons to Love Who You Are
By: Ann Mody Lewis, Ph.D.
Reason: 286 Page: 304
Commentary:
What is there about tears that bring us to our knees?
Are they an admission we are weak in a world that expects realness to dismiss what we feel?
Tears tell our truth! They were our first language...screaming to be fed, demanding diaper changes…and expressions of discomfort. With our tears we trained our parents to know our primal needs.
When did tears get concealed? When did feelings become a truth to never be revealed? As children we learn that being human is complicated by the shaming of our tears. They become embarrassing because they mean we're too human. We learn there's a time for everything, but hardly a time for tears!
Whether it's because you're mourning ending a close relationship, or because you're frustrated and hurt at the end of a bad day; once you wipe tears away, the world can seem like a friendlier place. All animals produce tears to lubricate their eyes, but only humans possess the emotional system that causes crying.
Crying is one of the most important ways we rid ourselves of anger, hurt, fears to reach peace.
Scientists tell us that crying reduces our stress by reducing cortisol, the stress hormone, levels in our system. That's why we usually feel lighter after a good cry. Stored cortisol can lead to health problems and emotional turmoil. Until adolescence boys and girls cry at about the same rate, but after adolescence boys rarely cry. This restriction puts men at risk for depression, but sadly their depression is rarely detected or treated. Besides the personal benefits of tears, there are also social benefits. Tears create a compassionate world by building community and deepening our involvement with the welfare of others.
Roland Orzabal writes in his song I Believe:
I believe that when the hurting and the pain has gone
We will be strong, Oh yes we will be strong
And I believe that if I'm crying while I write these words
Is it absurd? Or am I being real
I believe that if you knew just what these tears were for
They would just pour like every drop of rain
If you could believe that having a good cry is as healthy as eating a fresh salad, your life might be more tranquil. This month's topic challenges the cultural prejudice that tears shouldn't be necessary. Maybe that's why so many turn to medication.
Learning a better way is opening your mind to the forbidden emotion of sadness and its expression: tears.
Topic will include: How gender conditioning may be making men sick and women unhappy. How tears can bring us together personally and inter-personally. Are tears a show of weakness or courage? How can you overcome the inclination of shame when you cry?
Let's talk about tears so they fall like rain!
Ann
